Hello. Remember me?

I hope that you do. It is a difficult thing after almost three straight years of solid blogging to go for a long period of time without making an entry. And lets face it the past few weeks have seen plenty of that.

Of course I have a legitimate excuse. I have an overload of work to do. In fact here on Saturday afternoon sitting on my deck surrounded by my ill mannered and foul tempered dogs I feel guilty just writing this. I know I could/ should be working.

That is the problem when you are self-employed and bill by the hour. You take the work when you can get it. And you don’t refuse work. Ever. Unless you know that there is no way that you can possibly squeeze it in.

I have said to my wife this week that I wish I could find a way to work from midnight to six am. Unfortunately those hours are taken up with something called sleep, which I need, in abundance.

So my days the past few weeks have run like this: Up at six, shower. Let the dogs out, feed them, have breakfast.

7:00 am – start work (luckily since I work from home I don’t have to commute) keep working until my wife shows up with some lunch. Eat. Keep working till my wife brings down some dinner. Eat. Keep working till 11pm. Let the dogs out and go to bed. Repeat.

Not only have I not been blogging – I haven’t even been reading other blogs. Not even yours. Don’t feel bad. I haven’t been checking the Meatriarchy mailbox either. Who knows how many millions in African bank accounts I have been missing out on. Who knows how much discount viagra I have not had the opportunity to purchase. And pity my poor undersized penis and bosom. I no doubt have missed ample opportunities to enlarge both. My spammers seem to have decided I am some sort of hermaphrodite with both male and female attributes. Not only that – they are sure both are undersized. It sure is depressing not to make the grade on either side of the gender divide.

I have paid zero attention to politics in the past month. I can safely assume that Steven Harper is still scarier to most Canadians than … I don’t know Jason or Freddie Kruger?
Our forefathers who died at Ypres, Beaumont Hamel, Dieppe and at Normandy would no doubt be a tad bemused that the country they died for now lives in terror that a man who happens to go to church and believes in smaller and more accountable government might actually be democratically elected.

I have over the past few weeks had the occasion to speak to many folks in Calgary. Their feelings toward Toronto and the East are barely concealed below their friendly Albertan manners. Some don’t even bother to hide it.

Alberta is at this point in our history far more alienated than Quebec pretends to be. They are also, with oil at 60.00 a barrel (or closing in on that figure) enjoying unprecedented economic growth. One person told me of a gas station he drives by every day. The sign outside says “Help wanted. $10.00 an hour plus bonuses” the position has not yet been filled. I keep wondering what the bonuses might be? Free gas?

If you are down on your luck and need work go west. But leave your Eastern attitude behind.

I am trying to figure out a way to move to Calgary and still work from home. A house midway between downtown and the Rockies would suit me fine. Especially if I could have horses. Lately I have been desiring horses. I don’t know why. I don’t think it is merely the horse but the imagined lifestyle. I just don’t want to own one here in Ontario and have it stabled somewhere where I go by once a week and ride it for an hour.

I want to be able to get up in the morning saddle up and ride into the mountains. Then I want to campout under the stars.

Of course I would need to avail myself of the services of a chiropractor upon my return. I don’t seem to be able to sleep well on ground any more.

I told someone in Calgary this week that Calgarians should all spend at least two weeks a year in Toronto. Torontonians should in turn spend two weeks a year in Calgary. I think it would go along way towards healing the alienation of the West and would do wonders in allaying this irrational fear that Torontonians have of the west.

After all we do have some things in common. Right now Toronto is having it’s annual summer festival which features mustachioed men in chaps parading through the streets. In less than two weeks Calgary will have its own party again featuring men in chaps parading through the streets. That has to be a good starting point right?

Not only that but Calgarians could get a glimpse of their future – traffic snarled and hellish if they don’t do now what Toronto should have done 25 years ago – namely build highways. But no, Toronto “the good” was told that if they build highways it would lead to sprawl and more traffic. What have we now? Sprawl and gridlock and nowhere to build extra highway capacity. Those on the left who hate cars as much as they hate people who don’t agree with their utopian plan of things labour under the impression that people will clamber in droves onto their beloved public transit if they make it impossible to ride cars to work. But with the city expanding beyond the reach of the venerable (and deteriorating ) TTC this dream is not exactly going to come to pass in our lifetimes. If you want to get a true picture of the inane type of social engineering that passes for policy in Toronto witness the recent media fanfare over the passing of a new by-law that would penalize motorists for allowing their car to idle instead of parking it in some overpriced parking lot (if you can find one that isn’t full). The purpose is to cut down on smog emissions. However anyone who has driven in Toronto knows that most idling cars are not on the streets themselves but on the highways. Every morning great gobs of vehicles creep along the 401 and the QEW into Toronto never making speeds over 20kmh and often sitting for long stretches not moving at all – but with engines running. Now that’s what I call idling. Of course not one brave intrepid reporter brought that up during the press blitz that surrounded the passing of the new by-law. The only squawk of protest raised in the media was that there weren’t enough by law officers to enforce the law.

Great job reporters!! Your really are showing us bloggers why we will never be able to live up to your standards.

And if we want to cut down on smog and gridlock why aren’t we encouraging more people to work from home? The technology is there and while it would not be possible for everyone (those with small kids tell me they can’t work from home) you can’t tell me that most people actually need to go into work everyday just to answer email.

And why are companies so resistant to this? They are more than happy to outsource work to someone in India, but let someone suggest that people work from home a couple of days a week and you’d think you suggested, I dunno, that people work from home or something.

I’ll post some more tomorrow.

Popularity: 2% [?]